I think I baked just about every flavour of pie there is on this planet by being the model housewife. The best pie does not involve an oven though. The recipe includes a dashing lad's dipstick, a bed-- though not necessarily, and my aching cunt.

I may sound desperate, but there is no other way for an old hag such as myself to get a man but to be really desperate. I will be down on my knees if I have to just to experience again the intense sensation of having a man fuck me hard until my body ...

I've had a battery-operated boyfriend for the past 5 years and it does more good to me than my prick of an ex-husband if we're being honest. I'm still craving for a well hung lad though, nothing beats the elementary kind of fucking.

I fancy being treated roughly. Twisted into various positions just to see which one would reach the deepest parts of my quim. Cuffed, spanked, and tied up to the bed so that I wouldn't go anywhere while they get to do their wicked ways to me.

Tired of sending messages to women who seen zone you? Tired of chatting with ladies who are conservative? Hoping for a drastic change in your life before your penis retires? I'm here for you. I like men who are really dirty.

I have come to the conclusion that the best way to give a blowjob is to ask the bloke how he likes it. Though there are some who don't quite know how to ask for things. Which is why I base what they fancy on how much they moan and writhe.